Focused at Fifty

Sometimes all you need is that perfect song to put you in a good mood. It amazes me how certain songs from my past and present evoke such great memories and feelings. I was in such a miserable mood this morning at work and popped a CD in my computer. My mood changed almost immediately. Thank you to that certain song for changing my mood! I needed it after a difficult morning. Many years back, I went on a trip with my sister Sheryl to see Mom in the Florida Keys. Everytime now that I hear Gloria Estefan's album gloria! , it evokes such strong memories of that trip with Sheryl. With a Caribbean dance theme, the music takes me back to 1998, driving down US Route 1 south through the Keys, the car CD player blasting, smelling the salt air, the warm ocean breeze, passing palm trees, resorts, and marinas. What a wonderful time! On the flip side, a certain song will also bring me to tears thinking about Mom. There are songs that she listened to which remind me of my childhood with her.

While visiting Dad and Martha out in California for my 41st birthday, I was treated to meal after meal of new culinary experiences! As I stated in the blog article before, Martha is an accomplished cook and the simplest of lunches and dinners were elevated to gourmet status by her deft hand. For instance, one evening, Martha started us off with homemade pita and hummus. Tastes even better homemade! We dined on a medium rare rib eye. Unfortunately, as Martha, Dad, and I agreed, the ribeye turned out to be a bit tough, even cooked medium rare. BUT, our meal was elevated by grilled asparagus with an aoili sauce and roasted potatoes with an herbed mayonnaise of parsley, oregano, and chives. We drank a lovely 2009 Menage A Trois , a California red wine consisting of 3 varietals: Merlot, Cabernet, and Zinfandel. Dad had also picked up a wine to try, Poor Bob's California red wine. The irony of the name didn't escape my father, Bob. Unfortunately, although named extremely well, the

The best vacations leave you with incredible memories. Usually those memories are of places and things seen. Vistas, views, people seen, artwork, shows, treasure found and bought, and evenings out make up the memories most often associated with a great holiday away! My trip in June with my sister Sheryl out to Arcata, California, to see my Dad and my stepmom Martha was no exception to that idea but with one major addition, the food!  My stomach growls as write this. It was truly a vacation of epicurean delights!   (SOURCE) We traveled out for my 41st birthday and I knew I would eat well. Martha is an incredibly accomplished cook, and a cookbook author in her own right!  She has cowritten a wonderful cookbook, Locally Delicious: Recipes and Resources for eating on the North Coast  with 5 of her good friends. The ladies call themselves the Heirloom Tomatoes with each having tomato names reflective of their personalities. Martha is the Jersey Devil Tomato!  A link about the cookboo

(SOURCE) I grew up in the idyllic hometown of Wenonah, NJ. I have such fond memories of my youth there. In the 70's,  two out of our three neighbors were very, very nice. We had Violet and Tom Conoway across the street. They were a sweet elderly couple that acted as surrogate grandparents to Adam, Sheryl, and I. Mrs. Conoway would bake us cookies. We would come into their little kitchen which always smelled so good and have cookies and milk. Adam and I would follow Mr. Conoway around in his yard and garage. When we were really young, Mom and Dad would sometimes arrange for us to stay there for a bit if they had errands to run and we couldn't come along. Just popping in would assure yourself of getting an oatmeal cookie or two! On one side of our home were the Millers. Mr.and Mrs Miller were younger than the Conoways but about 10 years older than Mom and Dad. Mrs. Miller was sweet as well. They were the neighbors that my parents would talk to over the fence, have an occasio

www.retrotvmemories.com  (I do not own the rights to this pic)  When I was 28, I moved out of Philly down to Media, PA. As with any move to a new area, eventually you get around to choosing a new doctor, dentist, eye doctor, etc.  See I said eventually and not immediately. I happened to wait up to the last minute and went scrambling for a doctor when I came down with bronchitis.  I plunged into the spare bedroom still filled with unpacked boxes frantically looking for my health benefits guides. I needed a doctor and needed one fast! Finally after what seemed like a dozen boxes, I found my benefits guide listing doctors available in the area. Flipping page after page, I needed to find a doctor close by. I then remembered that Riddle Memorial Hospital was only a mile down the road, so I figured I would pick a doctor from there. I looked down the list and saw 'general medicine' and chose Dr. Morty Zimmerman. He sounded nice. So Dr. Zimmerman it was! I called immediately

When you have lost someone in your life, a spouse, child, parent, sibling, or close friend, the holidays become extremely difficult and sad. Judy Garland's version of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" from the musical "Meet Me in St. Louis" comes to mind. Judy sings, "From now on we'll have to muddle through somehow."  I find the lyric so sad and poignant. Later versions changed that lyric to the more positive ""Hang a shining star upon the highest bough!"  You can thank Frank Sinatra for the more jolly line. I actually like the sad lyric. It reminds me that there are others out there like me, that struggle to get through the holidays after losing a loved one. You try and put up a brave face but sometimes the sadness makes it difficult. Anyway, that's how I read it. I do have fun holidays though, but these days they are bittersweet.  My Mom was the focal point of our family. She gathered us kids at her house each year,

Back in the mid 90's when I was a partying twenty year old in Philly, I looked at my apartment as just a place to sleep. I got up, went to work, ate out, maybe came home to change, and then went out for the evening until sometimes 5 to 7 am. I was a hard partying kid. I have no regrets. It was all in good fun. I lived alone for the most part, other than for a stretch with my great roommates Greg and John, when I lived with them on Rittenhouse Square. My only other worthwhile companion was Smokey the Cat. My favorite apartment was at the Claremont apartment building at 10th and Clinton. I had a wide spacious studio apartment. I considered it a walk up as I didn't trust the elevator.  It creaked and shook between the 2nd and 3rd floors. I loved that apartment though and have fond memories of it.  My worst apartment was the Mole Hole. I named it after I discovered the back 1/3 was partially underground. After living with Greg and John for a couple of fun crazy years, I decided t

I just love the hip Philadelphia boutique  Swag , located in the latest trendy neighborhood, Northern Liberties!  What a great place for gifts and stocking stuffers!  My sister Sheryl and I had a great dinner one evening at Bar Ferdinand and decided to walk off the several rounds of tapas and signature drinks that we had. (Sidebar: For a great meal at reasonable prices in a fab Spanish atmosphere, check out Bar Ferdinand!  They make a wonderful Sangria too!)  If you are like me, you are always trying to find that fun affordable gift that will stand out above all others. You want your friends or family members to be talking about it long after the holidays! This is the place to get that fun, creative gift with flair.  Swag has office and housewarming gifts all about whimsy and fun, not to mention a great selection of pieces made by local artists and crafters. A couple of my favorite items I either bought or admired include: Nesting doll measuring cups:s Daily Mood Pads showing 47 m

In no particular order, these are some encounters from my past with those of the political arena that I remember for one reason or another. I met the former governor of Massachusetts, Michael Dukakis, on the Rutgers campus at a rally for his 1988 failed presidential bid. I don't remember his speech. Don't remember his promises, Don't remember his platform. I remember his eyebrows, black and bushy. I also remember Robert Redford introducing him! Although I didn't get to shake Robert Redford's hand, I do remember his sandy blond hair and piercing blue eyes. Very handsome Hollywood leading man looks. Michael Dukakis ... eyebrows. I was more excited to see his wife, Kitty Dukakis.  The year after Anita Hill testified in Washington D.C. against then US Supreme Court nominee Clarence Thomas, I waited on her while she was dining in the Azalea Dining Room at the Omni Hotel Philadelphia. She was very nice. Very soft spoken and polite. She was giving a speech in Philly. I

I came out of the voting booth this evening feeling troubled. Should I have voted for Sigmund T. Bigglesworth (*not his real name ... duh) for the position of county coroner? I mean he was of my party, but I really didn't know who Sigmund was. I wasn't even sure what the county coroner did but I knew it had to do with investigating dead people. I know I liked Sigmund's last name, Bigglesworth. It reminded me of a character I had read in a novel. Sigmund, I really didn't know a thing about you, my friend, and yet I still gave you my vote. Did I do the right thing? Does the average voter know all they need to know about the candidates they are voting for? I think not.  For years I have voted. I have felt very strongly in favor of it. My parents have always voted and taught us kids that it is our right, our privilege, and also our "civic duty" as they say, to vote. I truly believe that. Even if you feel you have no real voting power or your vote doesn't co

I love this slick video from National Geographic on our ever increasing world population and wanted to share it with my readers. Check out their others at http://www.nationalgeographic.com/

(SOURCE) Over the weekend, the lovable curmudgeon of a writer, Andy Rooney, passed away at the age of 92. Andy was a well known writer, humorist, and commentator on 60 minutes from 1978 to 2011. We should all be so lucky to live such a long life doing something we absolutely enjoy. I count Andy Rooney as one of my influences in writing.  My others include Erma Bombeck and David Sedaris. After years of trying to form my writing style or find my own niche, I finally gave up. That was an epiphany for me. I realized it needed to happen and develop naturally. Instead, I started reading writers that I admired or just liked what they wrote. My style soon developed on its own. That style is influenced by Andy Rooney. I had wanted to meet him one day and figured that if I ever say him in a restaurant, I would say hi. Andy Rooney's response would probably be, "Can you go away? I am trying to eat my dinner."

 Mom and I during a recent Christmas Holiday What sucks when someone close to you dies are the memories lost.   One of the things which I find particularly upsetting is that you end up starting to forget the memories of the person who has passed away. I come down on myself so much sometimes when I try and remember something that Mom did and cannot. I just don't want to forget anything about her. I was spent the day in Jim Thorpe, PA sightseeing today and came across some owl figurines. I remembered how much my mother used to love and collect owls back in the 70's and 80's. She had quite a collection of figurines. I suddenly became nervous and panicky that no one else would ever know that she just loved those owls! It would be a memory remembered by my sister Sheryl and brother Adam, but alas, ultimately lost. I grew very sad. I also remembered how recently, she loved hearing about my local trips around the area and camping:  hiking around the Northwest; my sister'

On October 29th of this year, a nor'easter hit the northeastern US causing destruction in its path. They called it Snow-tober. Snow fell at unprecedented rates felling trees left and right which had not yet lost their leaves. Several million were without power. It was a storm causing more damage and outages than Hurricane Irene's path through the area in August of this same year.  We lost power for about 8 hours. Some areas were still without power five days later. My area, Schuylkill County, received between 8 and 16 inches of heavy wet snow. Some areas had snow drifts of 2 feet!  By the time it was over, my yard had several trees down with at least as many bushes destroyed.  In my front yard are two large silver maple trees which lost all of the top branches from the weight of the snow on the leaves. A good 15 - 20 feet were snapped off the top of each one. In the middle of the yard, a beautiful cherry blossom tree fell over. We are going to attempted to replant it with 5 fr

Growing up 70's and 80's, Halloween was always fun in my house. As I have stated in previous blogs, my family didn't have that much disposable income when I was young, so alot of costumes were homemade. We kids didn't complain too much, it was just how it was. I knew I wanted to be something else, but when the end result was still getting candy, I was still happy. Therefore, in the Haynes household, Sheryl, Adam, and I were often hobos, bums, or clowns!  I do remember one year, when I was 6 or 7, that I pleaded for Mom to buy me a skull mask. I wanted it SO bad! She gave in and bought it for me. We had no idea what I was going to do for the skeleton body though. Never thought once about that. Halloween crept closer, and I started asking with urgency, "What about my skeleton body!"  Mom suggested ratty clothes and I stated that I just couldn't been seen in ratty clothes and a skull!  Didn't she know that wasn't a skeleton! I need a skeleton body a

 (SOURCE)  For several years in the late 90's and early 00's,  I was a purchaser at the Ritz-Carlton Hotel in Philadelphia. Specifically, I was in charge of purchasing the wine, liquor, and beer. Every week I would put in my order for the hotel and its restaurant outlets. We aren’t talking about a couple bottles were and there. We are talking about liquor and wine orders of up to 40 cases, sometimes on special weekends, double that amount. One top of that, an average of 30 cases of various beer would be delivered by the beer guy. I would fill the orders of the bartenders and outlets and delivery them down to the various bars, restaurants, and banquet areas. I also actively participated in tastings with the vendors that sold to us. Many times I took part in them knowing full well that I would not be carrying the vendors bubble gum flavored vodka in lobby bar, but just wanted to see what it tasted like! I would schedule liquor and wine tastings throughout the day. One par

More than a few friends have asked me how I choose what I write about.  Sometimes an idea just comes to me and I write about it, going off on a tangent for several paragraphs. Other times, I go to my little notebook of ideas. I keep a running list in a notebook of topics that I want to write about at some point in the future. As I write about them, I check them off, one by one. I carry a little notebook with me to jot down ideas, keep one by the bed, and keep one in the car, just in case!

I discovered this recipe for a balsamic vinaigrette dressing awhile ago while surfing the net and I just love it. I found it on the Food Network website. It is by famed chef Emeril Lagasse. I had wanted something simple I could do in 10-15 minutes for a tossed salad.  I included the link to the recipe below. I have even changed it up by adding some Dijon Mustard for a Dijon Vinaigrette. Add for taste. You can also mix it up by adding soy sauce, lemon juice, honey, walnut oil, sesame oil, rosemary flavored olive oil, basil flavored olive oil, or any other flavors!  Enjoy! http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/emeril-lagasse/simple-balsamic-vinaigrette-recipe/index.html

(SOURCE) Working in the hotel/restaurant business has afforded me many an opportunity to meet celebrities. I am fortunate to have mixed with some interesting folk, or at the very least, had some interesting run ins with the Glitterati, the Glam, and the occasional Goth rocker.  In a new segment on my blog, I am going to write about these fun and sometimes not so fun encounters. Hope you enjoy! As I wrote about before, one of my favorite encounters was with Chef Julia Child. I have met other chefs though. One of my most memorable was meeting Chef Marcus Sammuelson while he was head chef for Washington Square, a restaurant in Philly by famed restaurateur Stephen Starr.  I was there sipping Champagne with one of my close friends Jerry when we decided to order an appetizer. Having never had sweetbreads, we decided to given them a try.  For those of you that do not know, sweetbreads are either the pancreas or thymus in calf, lamb, beef, or pork. For the life of me, I wasn't not sure

Sometimes we need a break and boy did I ever! I went off the "grid" for a bit just to refresh my mind and soul. I took a week off and stayed in a cabin at Worlds End State Park in Forksville, PA. Hiked all around, roasted marshmallows, sat by the Loyalsock Creek for hours and just watched it tumble by. Also went on a couple short trips to Hershey PA and Gettysburg, PA. Love doing the touristy stuff! The Vista at World's End State Park I had vowed to try and not go online during that week. I really didn't tell alot of people and so friends started to wonder if I was alright. Sorry if I worried anyone! Sometimes you just need that mental break. It was nice not to have to type on on the keyboard for awhile. I needed the mental break too. Just to think about where I am going, what I am doing. Remind me what is important in life and what is not. That sort of thing. When I came back and went back to work, I was overwhelmed last week! My job at Domestic Relations is o